edited November -1 in General Discussion
Politics is the art of being wrong. The name is based on the words Poly and Ticks, Poly meaning many, and ticks meaning blood sucking parasites. Politics therefore means many blood thirsty parasites. Basically, these politics/politiks or politicians exist to drink the blood of the citizens of a nation.

There are generally three categories of politicians: liberals, moderates, and conservatives. In the economic spectrum, there are Socialists, Mixed Economy/ Social Democrats and Capitalists. Each are equally partial to the sweet, sweet fuckred liquor of the populace. Conservatives want to make all but the the richest 1% into slave laborers who are forced to build giant pyramids, whereas Liberals want to allow gays to legally marry you against your will. Moderates strike a balance between the two positions, arguing that gays can only force you into a "civil union" and that everyone should have the option of building giant pyramids. Besides these groups, other known practitioners of politics include waitresses, who are most proficient at doing so while businessmen slowly get stoned. Socialism is promoted by intellectuals, scientists and wannabe hippies who believe that they (the intellectuals) are smarter and thus should control the state, which should direct economic activity in a rational manner. The opposite of socialism is capitalism, which is promoted by businesspeople, corporations, spoiled brats and libertarian nutjobs who believe they are the most capable to run and direct society on behalf of the capitalist market, because the freedom for corporations to do as they please and the religious pursuit of profit is the very definition of freedom. Inbetween the socialists and the capitalists are the social democrats who advocate a mixed economy - a bastardized synthesized version of both of them. The liberals support this position. There are also the fascists, who believe war, glory and the nation are most important. They typically consist of people who have not accomplished anything of their own, so take pride in their nation, "race" or megalomaniac leader.

Politics exists in many countries however the most exciting varieties exist only in the United States, where it is sometimes referred to as 'snuff' politics due to the amount of Bush and Gore it contains. There is only 1 polit-rule. The politician lies when he moves mouth.
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